Rights and wrongs of parenting

How do you know when you are doing the right thing as a parent? 

Unfortunately there is no answer to that question. 

The "right thing" is a subject concept in general based on any given individuals opinion of what is right and wrong but then add the variable of how every child is different in their personalities and preferences, what works for one may not work for another.  There is no handbook or given rules and guidelines for parents so most of the time we literally have nothing to go on.  I was actually very surprised after I had Max and the hospital just lets you take them home after 24 hours with just a page or so of instructions.  Then his Pediatrician is so laid back when I would ask him questions he was more like a therapist who would give you pros and cons of both ends of the spectrum options and never give a straight answer as to which works better.  Then seeing I was exasperated and confused, I would get the "you are doing just fine Mom" speech.  But it makes sense why he does that.  Max was healthy and happy so at this point all he is doing is reassuring me I am doing a good job.  And we as parents need that constant reassurance.  We literally have no idea what we are doing a lot of time and are constantly scrutinizing and questioning what we should be doing and if we are doing the right thing.  As long as your child is not being abused or neglected in any way what does it matter if you do time out or spankings, breast feed or formula feed, send them to daycare or don't send them to daycare, etc?  We worry too much about what other people are doing and what works for them.  Now, I'm not saying if you need advise on anything you shouldn't ask or take your friend's advice b/c hey I remember how hard it was to potty train and we took lots of advice and tried lots of things but don't judge another parent because your method didn't work for them or they decided something else would be better suited.  Don't judge me.  Yes, I let my child have a pacifier until a little bit after 2 years old, we tried to give it up sooner and it made everyone miserable so we decided to wait until he was old enough to reason with and had no issues giving it up then.  It worked for us.  And likewise, because I had no issues with Max staying in his bed or room at night (from the age of 6 weeks on) when I hear of someone saying their child sleeps with them I go "whoa" inside but that child is not my child and may have different sleep habits and needs from my child so who am I to judge? 

When another person tells me what a great job I am doing with Max or comments on how smart he is or well adjusted I really feel like I have done my job as a parent.  So am I doing the right thing for my child?  I think so.  But my rights and wrongs may differ from yours.  So if I am doing something you don't agree with, it would be best to keep your mouth shut and concentrate on something good I am doing.  It will make both of us feel better in the long run. 

"This job is definitely the hardest job I have ever had but also the most rewarding."